My son is in preschool, and while visiting my parents this week, my Mother spent time teaching my son to read. Now I was reading at the ripe old age of 3 1/2, a willing pupil who sat still and passively took direction quite well from mother as she drilled me with sight words and phonics. My son, on the other hand, is not quite so still. It occurred to me that not everyone is aware of the different learning styles among people of all ages, something that I learned early in my teacher training at the university.

So without writing a dissertation on learning styles, I'll share a few insights with you that may help you increase your tolerance with coworkers, spouses, and even make peace with yourself.

There are three (3) basic styles of learning, which affect the way we organize or categorize data and process it:

1. Auditory
2. Visual
3. Kinesthetic

I'm sure there are an infinite number of combinations of the three, but these are starting points. Some of you already know your strengths (and weaknesses), having discovered them during management training or earlier in the academic classroom. Others are still struggling to find their personal sense of style, moving from planner to calendar, and back again-- frustrated with the whole system. But once you've learned your own individual style of learning, you can translate this into a workable system to organize your home, office, and entire life. You will understand why your assistant doesn't file using your system, and why your son can't use the handy-dandy planner you bought him for time management.

VISUAL LEARNERS are those who need to see something before they can move on to the next thing on the agenda. Whether you need to have all your bills and appointment reminders on a bulletin board to stimulate your memory, or must close your eyes during a seminar to form a mental picture of what the speaker is trying to convey, being a visual learner is learning to use things out in the open to manage time and organize your workspace. Perhaps using a list or writing down appointments in a planner are just not enough for you to get a grasp of your schedule. You think in a linear fashion, much like the time line we were introduced to in 4th grade history class. Use a large yearly wall planner to see at a glance how your projects will progress and flow, rather than limiting yourself to a small page in a planner. Or use both within limits, keeping the planner as a Master Calendar that is also portable, but referring to the wall planner to see the big picture.

Office organizing needs to be visually stimulating as well. Use clear acrylic containers for office supplies, wall pockets to hold manila folders for special projects, or brightly colored stickers or folders for works in progress (red for hot sales leads, green for overdue accounts, orange for old clients needing follow-up). If "out of sight, out of mind" is your mantra, then don't file all folders away in the file cabinet. Use a rolling cart beside your desk for work in progress, rolling it away when not in use. Or place a stair-step rack on the top of your desk to hold manila folders for quick retrieval. If you need a uniform look to your desktop to help you concentrate, use a label maker to create the titles for your files. You don't have to have desktop clutter to enjoy visual reminders of appointments, projects, or special occasions.

AUDITORY LEARNERS usually need to repeat instructions, talk to themselves, and benefit from focus groups and study sessions. Hearing is remembering, and all the list-making in the world is not going to help them remember a presentation date or their wife's birthday. However, using a voice recorder to document appointments and follow up dates will keep them on track, avoiding missed meetings and forgotten birthdays. If you find that you need both visual reminders and verbal cues, use a simple master planner such as a desktop calendar for appointments, and use your recording device to list your "to do's". If you are studying for a management class, dictate your notes into a tape recorder and play them back so that you can hear and learn. Not only is this an effective learning tool, but it's a great way to "multi-task" by listening to tapes as you drive, jog, or prepare dinner.

KINESTHETIC LEARNERS are the most misunderstood group of all. Often mislabeled as "hyper" or "wiggle worms", these are the people who use their pencils to play the drums on their desk, wiggle their foot as they sit in the reception area, or don't give you eye contact during a presentation. That's not to say that they aren't listening, but they need to be moving most of the time, and this includes when they are learning. My son falls into this category, and watching him stand on his head as he recites his alphabet, is enough to drive his traditional grandmother nuts. It would be so easy for her to try to squeeze him into the mold of learning that most teachers use: passive listening, or repetitive drills. And in a classroom or group setting, this is usually all that the instructor can provide. But one on one, she is able to pick up on the cues that he is a kinesthetic or active learner, and processes information as he moves around. She patiently waits for him to pass by the work table to see the next letter of the day, rather than sit through a long game of flashcards.

Having a basic understanding of how people learn enables us to know how to teach them. Although we are not all teachers, we are all learners, and need to acknowledge and accept our individual style of organization. Knowing how we learn, how we work, and how we grow our businesses helps us to establish the optimum work environment for ourselves and those working around us. Rather than giving up on ourselves as one of the organizationally challenged, unable to use the high dollar planner given to use by our business coach, we can use alternate tools of organization to manage our time and our work space. Learning to understand the other styles of organization will help us become more tolerant of those chaos creators who run late, lose important documents, and otherwise make our time unmanageable. We don't have to like it, but at least we can understand it.

So learn your style of organization, accept the fact that it makes you who you are. Learn to work with your style, not against it, and take advantage of all the wonderful organizational tools ready to help you on your way to optimum learning. Maybe this column will remind you not to laugh at those Visual Learners writing in the air with their fingers to compute sales tax at a business lunch. Or you'll finally understand why your Auditory Learner husband talks to himself as he's programming the computer. And you'll have a bit more patience for your Kinesthetic Learner son as he hops up the steps reciting his multiplication table. It's all a matter of style, and once you find yours, you're well on your way to staying organized and living a more balanced life. Happy discovering!